One of the pitfalls of perfectionism is waiting until everything is in place (or until you’re “fully ready”) before taking action. Because when are you ever fully ready?
If you’re anything like me, that day never comes.
All of your waiting leads to much less creation. And less creation = withholding your gifts, experiencing less joy, and making a smaller contribution to the world at large. Yikes!
Waiting isn’t fun, but it’s safe. You don’t have to put yourself out there or risk failure. You think you have control because you’re managing all the details in your mind.
I am tempted to do this all the time. I want to wait before taking action on things – especially things that are meaningful and linked to a big dream or goal of mine.
An idea pops into my mind and I feel extremely energized and excited about it, but then I prefer to think about it forever instead of getting into gear.
In order to make things happen, I have to override that pattern and get out of my own way.
Today I’m sharing how I do that, with a very recent example and a short, step-by-step process you can follow at the end!
WAITING ON MY DREAM
Two weeks ago I was attending a networking event and shared my dream of hosting small women’s coaching circles with a new friend. This is something I’d fantasized about for years. I already had the whole thing mapped out in my mind!
My new friend listened to my in-depth description and then said, “Omg! Why aren’t you doing this now?!?”
I told her I was waiting until I had a space where I could host the group, somewhere private and beautiful that I could rent out...maybe a space of my own...
She wasn’t buying the excuse. She asked me more about the vibe I had in mind. Maybe there was a way to create this experience now.
I told her I wanted it to be a relaxed gathering – a casual space for women to come together and feel comfortable letting their guards down and opening up in front of one another as I supported them 1-on-1 in front of the group. I pictured us all barefoot, sitting cross-legged in a circle, with a cool breeze blowing by…
“Girl! Do it in a park! Or the beach! I don’t care where you do it, I’ll go! That sounds amazing. You can call it...Barefoot Coaching!”
And with that, Barefoot Coaching was born!
KICKING PERFECTIONISM TO THE CURB
I could feel my inner perfectionist chomping at the bit to slow the process down almost instantly. It said things like:
Maybe I should wait a few weeks – or even months – to launch, just so I can sort out all the details. This is all happening so fast. June is almost over. There's so much happening in July. I'm moving in August. Maybe I'll start in September...
Okay, fine, June. I'll make it happen in June. But can I plan it all in time?
Alright, I've got it planned. But will anyone actually come?
It's official! Tickets are purchased and people are definitely coming. But this is less structured than the other workshops I’ve lead...what if nobody volunteers for coaching?!
PHEW! Taming your inner perfectionist takes work, people! I repeatedly had to quiet all of the fears and questions that surfaced, and keep moving forward despite them. But guess what? It was all worth it...
WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU GO FOR IT
Today I hosted the first Barefoot Coaching Circle in a local park, and it was AWESOME! Everything I dreamt of and more. I had the most incredible group of women attend. They brought great energy, had open minds, and shared vulnerably about the things they want to create in their lives and businesses.
We sat underneath the shade of a big tree with the breeze blowing by, just as I’d imagined in my vision of this event. I lead a group centering and solo journaling activity before opening up the floor for individual coaching.
Coaching is always my favorite part, and I loved every minute of supporting each attendee 1-on-1 in whatever they wanted clarity around. I’m especially grateful to the group for their willingness to dive right in and share in front of each other. That takes courage, and it creates an opening for real connection and growth.
By the end, everyone had bonded and there were big smiles all around! Here we are right after the event (you can feel the joy in this photo!):
The whole experience felt so natural and uplifting, and came together so easily. This is what creating from a place of inspiration – and not letting fear run the show – looks like. It flows.
So if there’s something you’ve been wanting to do, but have put off for a long time, trust me: you can’t wait for the fear to go away! It might hang around forever. Taking action is your ticket to greater confidence, joy, and fulfillment right now.
Those feelings are ready and waiting, and if you're game to experience more of them ASAP, I highly recommend the process below:
1. Think of something you’ve been wanting to do/create
2. Ask yourself:
- What’s stopping me from doing this now? (And closely examine your reasons for waiting)
Is there a rough draft version I can create sooner? (If so, what would that look like?)
If I were to do this now, what would the immediate next step be? (Identify at least one tangible next step)
Am I willing to take this next step? If so, when? (Put a date on the calendar)
3. Establish a clear intention for your desired outcome
4. Focus on the positive feelings associated with it and allow them to carry you forward as you take your immediate next step.
5. Notice any fear-based thoughts that come up, recognize that's normal, and then keep going anyway!
If you do this exercise, I’d love to know what you’re planning on doing next!
Hit reply so I can cheer you on, and remember: there’s no time like the present to get started, especially if it’s on something you feel called to create!
P.S. Today's event was so much fun that I'm planning on hosting another Barefoot Coaching Circle in San Diego soon! If you live in the area and would like to join next time, comment below or shoot me a message here and I'll keep you in the loop :)